rising from the ground

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Title: What Is Undone
Rating: R
Chapter: Part Five
Pairing: Luke/Noah
Summary: Sometimes love is your only chance.
Disclaimer: Sadly I don’t own any of the boys I like to play with. All rights for the characters go to P&G, ATWT, JP, CG, etc.
Beta: The phenomenal and wonderful mactwck. Thank you!
W/C: 8850
Warnings: Attitudes that will piss you off, some violence, definite cursing...a little cracky which begins here.
Author’s Note: More crackiness and stuff. I've decide to try to post every other day so the fic is up before I hit Rock the Soap! So hey! Bonus! Enjoy! And feedback is yearned, loved and appreciated.


Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four






Part Five

Holden ran through the double doors of the hospital emergency room, dropping his cell in the process and having to bend to pick it up. His eyes scanned the area and when he found Bob, he headed in his direction. Reaching the older man, Holden waited, studying the doctor as he told him that the accident had only been a small one and that everyone was doing fine.

His heart had dropped to the floor when he had received the call that his mother and the girls had been a car accident. He couldn't take any more loss. “But they’re okay?”
Bob patted his shoulder gently. “Not a scratch. They’re actually up with Lily. Go on and find them.” With that, the other man turned his attention back to the patients that needed him.

Taking the elevator to Lily’s floor, he took the time to calm down. Everything was fine. He hadn’t lost anyone else. Stepping onto the floor, the nursing staff greeted him, and Holden smiled in return. They were wonderful with Lily. He paused at the door, watching as Natalie tucked the blanket that she and Faith had made for their mother around her, talking animatedly about school and the horses.

It was Faith who stood in the farthest corner, staring at the seemingly lifeless body of her mother. When she looked up, her eyes were red and a little wet. Holden motioned to her and she ran into his arms, sniffing into his arm. “I’m sorry, Dad. I miss her.”

“I know, baby. I know you do.”

After several minutes of silence, he let her go, tweaking her nose when she pulled back, managed to get a smile from her. “We have to keep believing.”

“I do. Parker says…,” she stopped and shook her head, wiping at her eyes. “It doesn’t matter. I believe. I just had a moment.” When she smiled at him, it was like looking straight at Lily and it tore just a little bit of his heart apart.

“Good. Now why don’t you, Nat, and Mama go downstairs and get something to eat. Then, you can come back up and spend a few more moments with your Mom.”

She nodded, heading out the door behind Nat, who had paused to throw her arms around Holden’s legs and squeeze, before going out the door. He looked up at his mother’s face, sadness and pride warring in her eyes. “It’s okay, Mama.”

She hugged him, kissing his face softly. “You’re the best man I know, Holden. God won't leave you now.” When he nodded, she kissed his forehead, and then left him to be with his wife.

She was beautiful even like she was, so still, pale, looking like he remembered, when he had first seen her so young and vulnerable. What was missing was the fire she had then and the heat between them that had burned so hot around them for so long.

Taking the seat that Natalie had vacated, he took one of Lily’s slender, cool hands in his. Pushing back a strand of her hair, he sighed deeply. “I need you, Lily. Do you hear me, sweetheart? I can’t do this alone. I can’t look for our son alone. It’s as if a part of me is missing and it’s with you. I need you to wake up. For us. For our family. Please.” He leaned down to press a kiss on her hand, rubbing his cheek against soft skin.

The hand on his cheek moved and Holden stood still, half expecting it to be his own wishful thinking. His wanting to have Lily back so badly.

“Holden.”

Wide eyes looked up and met half-closed ones, and when Lily’s mouth turned up in a weak smile, Holden felt like he could breathe again. Lily had come back to him.

*

They were going on some sort of outdoor retreat for the day and breakfast was being served extra early. Luke didn't care much for getting up at the crack of dawn, when he could barely remember his own name. He rubbed at itchy eyes, inching toward the table at the side and toward the back where they always congregated. His senses responded almost immediately at the sight of Noah, quietly eating next to Evie.

When Luke got closer, Noah glanced up and, probably without realizing, he threw him a smile. It was small and short-lived but it made Luke feel like he had been handed the world. He caught Evie’s gaping expression and shrugged, grinning at her.

He took a seat next to Alma, one of the newer girls that had arrived just the week before. She didn't say much, just chewed her food so Luke dug into his own breakfast. Nobody knew how long this was going to last and he didn't want to starve while they communed with God.

Marc took the seat across from him and next to Evie, his face scrunched into some facial expression that could only be called worry. Marc was a live action cartoon in many ways. That may have had something to do with the fact he talked with his hands and wanted to be an animator. He looked down the table to Noah. “Hey, have you seen Ryan?”

Noah’s hand, which had been tapping against the table softly, stopped and he brought startled eyes up to Marc. “Why? I thought he was with you.”

Marc shook his head, eyes now mirroring Noah’s. “No. I got stopped by Kreeger on my way to watch Ryan and put on all night probation.” When Noah raised his eyebrow, Marc threw up his hands, “Hey, I didn’t do anything. He just decided to screw with me, I guess.”

Evie glanced around the room. “I can’t see him in the line or anywhere else.” She glanced at Luke and he shook his head.

“I haven’t seen him since two days ago when…” Luke trailed off, meeting Noah’s increasingly panicked stare. “It doesn’t mean anything.”

He said the words but didn't believe them.

Noah’s eyes lost their focus on him and seemed to target something across the room. He rose up slowly, hands clenched into fists, leaning on the table. Luke watched him swallow, following the line of his neck, before shaking his head and turning to find whatever it was that was making Noah react that way.

When his eyes found Ryan, there was a wave of relief through him. He was okay. That was good. It was then he noticed that Ryan wasn't looking in their direction. He seemed to be talking to Marcie intently, nodding at whatever she was saying. Luke’s heart dropped to his stomach.

Ryan hated Marcie.

Paul came up to them, pointing in the general direction of the group and Luke’s eyes stayed on Ryan’s face. Watching as his blank eyes studied Paul. When Paul nodded at Ryan, all he received in return was a nod, not a smile, not lit up eyes full of unrequited love, and not a tremble of lips.

He received a nod.

Evie voice trembled behind him as she spoke softly. “No. Not Ryan.”

“Yes. Ryan.” Marc’s voice was hard and angry.

Noah’s heartbroken response brought tears to Luke’s eyes.

“No. Ryan doesn’t exist. Not anymore.”

Ryan’s eyes found them across the room and he gave them a passing over. He walked over to the increasing group of others that now had two full tables. They all dressed similarly, all acting as they should, all smiling.

They acted as if the world wasn't falling apart around them.

*

Kevin’s head throbbed some beat from a song he must have heard the night before. His weeklong drinking binge and partying had taken its toll finally and when he had passed out, he had been taken to the hospital for a checkup.

It was during his long night’s stay for observation and during his subsequent sobering up that this niggling thought at the back of his mind started itching. There was something important he had to remember. Someone…he had to remember.

When Luke’s face finally materialized in his mind, his headache increased by tenfold.

Luke had contacted him.

Missing Luke, whose family had been looking for him for months, had contacted him.

He had been some fucking, drunk asshole because he couldn't handle the fact that Luke was….

Well, he was…

Kevin held his head in his hands, his gut burning with a hangover and something more. He knew part of him was scared about Luke. Everything had changed now. His friend, his best friend, was in love with him.

There wasn't a thing Kevin could do to change that.

Whatever he might feel for Luke, he was pretty damn sure, it was not that kind of love. Knowing that Luke felt that way, that he had been keeping himself from him, had been lying to him, had pissed him off.

Drunk and pissed off made Kevin a complete idiot.

The things he had said.

“Not Damian! Holden. My dad. Tell him they have me somewhere up North. I don‘t the exact state but it‘s near Canada. That much I know.”

“I don’t want to do anything. You need help, Luke. Your father’s right. I don’t want a faggot for a best friend. I don’t want you for anything. Don’t call me again.”

“No! Kevin, no!”

“Oh God! What the hell did I do?” The words fell rough and raw from his mouth. It was as if something had died inside it but he swallowed it down. He hadn't meant those words. Okay, maybe a part of him had. That part that was so much like his own father. Mean, disgusting and drunk, that part that Kevin hated so much.

“Good morning.”

Kevin turned his head toward the sound, blinking in recognition. “Becky?”

“Hmm. That’s a good sign. Remembering people.”

“You were always kinda hard to forget.” He rasped the last part out, coughing until Becky handed him water, letting him sip it slowly. He took note of the stripped clothes she wore. “You work here.”

“Volunteer.”

“I never thought you were into this kind of thing. You know, girl stuff.”

Becky raised an eyebrow but only shrugged, helping him back into his bed. “I consider it helping stuff but yeah, I am.”

It had been a long time since he and Becky had talked. Not since elementary school where everything had changed.

“You know, I think maybe you should tell someone.”

He looked at her in surprise and she shrugged once more, staring him straight in the eye. “You talk in your sleep. Whatever it is you need to tell whoever, you should.”

In the next moment, she was gone and he was alone.

Regardless of anything else, of what he had said, of what he felt, he couldn't just leave Luke that way.

He tried to get to his feet, wobbling a little. That wasn't a good sign.

He had to get to the farm.

He had to tell Mr. Snyder.

It was the least he could do.

*

It was hell on earth.

That was the only way Luke could describe it. It was like every nightmare they had.

He could see Noah’s stare following Ryan across the lawn. His eyes had blanked out, letting no light in or out from what Luke could see. Evie was leaning against a tree to his left, staring at the ground. She had barely spoken three words since breakfast. Marc was angry, pacing back and forth like a caged tiger. It was in complete opposition to Noah’s utter stillness.

It was like he believed if he moved, if he did anything that would make it real, it would be.

Luke completely understood that. It was the same thought he kept having in his own mind. This was some ridiculous dream and when he woke up, Ryan would still be laughing, flailing, and driving them nuts. Or he would be at home in bed. His eyes found Noah’s and a little ache started in his chest and spread. It would mean never having met… any of them. Never having met Noah.

He knew Noah would be the first to tell him that he wasn't worth it.

The day found Luke sitting in a circle near the lake sharing, or in his case, listening to why God loved him despite being a spawn from hell with no morals. He was sure he would start screaming in pain any minute now. Evie shifted next to him and when he looked, she was leaning on his shoulder. He pressed back against hers and they sat looking at the faces around them, some hollow and unhappy, others fervent and excited.

Yet, others just sat with no emotion and no fear.

Nothing.

Ryan kept his eyes trained on Paul, who was leading the newest round of discussion and sermon. It was creepy to watch him and see nothing of the heat that he always carried when it came to Paul. He didn't flinch or fidget when Paul touched his shoulder and asked for his workbook. He simply handed it over and then returned to staring blankly. He smiled when he thought he should. Luke wanted to believe that maybe Ryan wasn't all gone, that this was some scheme on his part.

However, he knew when Ryan glanced their way, eyes falling on Noah, that he was gone. There wasn't anything there, not that adoration Ryan had for Noah, not any underlining confusion or pain. It was as if he didn't even really recognize them anymore.

When it was finally over and they trudged back to the house, Luke fell into step beside Evie. She was walking slowly, staring out over the woods a few hundred yards away, her eyes focused on that far away clump of trees and beyond. Luke realized she knew what was there. She must have known all along.

There was a little anger in his thoughts. If they knew, why hadn’t they run?

It was as if she heard him speak and her voice was soft.

“Someone tried before and didn’t make it.” She glanced back at him and shrugged. “Noah told me you found it.”

He offered his arm and they wandered a little from the group, other small clumps of members also having decided to take advantage of the fading light to take a stroll. Some of the staff headed their way, following some feet behind. They passed Evie and Luke by, smiling in their direction, as they always did.

They were following the rules. They were being what they should be.

Evie’s fingers clutched his arm and she sighed. “You know that Noah’s been here a while, right?”

Luke almost stopped breathing. Evie’s voice told him everything. Whatever she was about to say to him was important. “I’d heard that, yes. Six months or something.” That was ridiculous.

Evie snorted some and shook her head. “That wasn’t even how long he’d been here when you got to this place.”

Luke paused, staring at her face, barely visible in the now darkening night. “Wait. What? How long…”

“One year. Maybe more. He won't say.”

“Jesus.”

“Tell me about it.” Evie ran a hand through her hair, continuing on the path before them, stopping to pick up a pebble and throw it as far as she could in front of them. “When he got here, he was different.” She glanced at him. “Hell, Luke. Before you got here, he was different.” Sighing, she took his arm once more and guided him toward the house. “People see what they want in Noah. Did he know he was gay before he got here? I assume he did. Was he in denial? I don’t know about that. I think that he simply didn’t think about it. But they did a real number on him. They had him believing their entire line of crack.”

Luke smiled a little at that and squeezed Evie’s trembling fingers. “He was still pretty great even when I first met him, when he was doing their bidding. It was Marc, David and me. We all arrived pretty much on the same bus, ranging from raging to slightly pissed off. We hit it off right away despite all the crap he spewed at us.” She closed her eyes, Luke imagined she was back in that moment and when she spoke again, it almost sounded far away. “David and Noah developed this friendship. Something similar to what he had with Ryan. It was sweet but not inappropriate. Nothing romantic.”

Her eyes found his and he heard the unspoken, not what he feels for you, implied there. It was too much right at that moment and he looked away. Evie took the hint and went on. “It was more brotherly, you know. Anyway, David was funny and outspoken. He hated it here. I mean, we all hate it here but David. Absolutely, completely hated it here. He didn't like the rules and fought against everything they threw at him. Complete opposite of Noah, who, and this is what he told me later, assimilated as best he could because that was what he was taught. Anyway, I think we were here, maybe a month, when David disappeared...”

Luke stopped, arms crossing and he stared at Evie, barely making any of her features out now that darkness had fallen but he could see the pain on her face.

“Noah was a little frantic. He was in charge of the kid, you know. It was two days and nothing.” Evie swallowed back a lump and stared off into the woods again. “I don’t know what made him go look.”

Luke didn't glance in the direction that Evie was staring. He was sure he could imagine, being a writer gave him an active enough mind, and he knew it would be better if he didn't actually think about. “Noah found him.”

“Apparently, he had admitted to one of the others, one of the staff, that he had feelings for Noah. Non-brotherly feelings for him and they told Kreeger and he… What he did was string David up in the trees, arms tied to branches and left him there. Some sort of biblical torture from what we could gather. Of course, that was after he‘d sent enough volt‘s through the kid‘s head, I‘m surprised it wasn‘t mush.”

Luke covered his mouth and forced the nausea back down.

“They hadn’t intended on…What they didn’t expect was the animals… David was a sitting duck. Yes. Noah found him. He died there, in his arms.”

Evie shuddered, wrapping her arms around her shoulders, tears streaming down her face. “Noah doesn’t talk about that. Ever. All I know is that he lost it. Screaming and accusing them all of murder. He snapped completely. They broke Noah. Then he was gone for two weeks. Marc and I were convinced he was dead, too. But one day, he was back, like nothing had happened.”

Luke saw her eyes sharpen, her smile turn bitter. “At least, that’s what they all assume. They pretty much did the same to Noah that they had David. Minus the string. They had learned something, I guess. Electro shock, mind numbing brain washing, solitary confinement, he survived it all. And the guy that went in wasn’t the one that came out.” Evie shook her head; eyes finding Luke’s and this smile was full of pride. “What they did was prove to Noah that who he is, isn’t wrong. Because if being like them meant torture and murder, he knew better. Noah came out, literally.”

Luke felt a giggle escape, it was nervous and full of pain, but Evie grabbed his hand and tugged him along. “You can understand why noone even thinks about trying anymore. Believe me, Luke, if Noah had anything to say about it, nothing like this was going to happen to you. Or me. Or Marc.”

“Or Ryan.” Luke breathed it out and closed his eyes. He could relate to feeling as if you had let someone you cared about down. He had done that plenty.

“He has a plan.” Evie said quietly.

When Luke asked what it was, she shrugged and shook her head. “I haven’t the faintest. But I know he came back for a reason.”

*

If he held still long enough maybe, it would all disappear. All the pain and failure he felt, now that he had let them down. Somewhere in the back of his mind, a voice told him it wasn't his fault. It sounded vaguely familiar. Maybe it was true, there wasn't anything he could have done, but Noah knew it fell on him to have protected Ryan.

He was supposed to change all this. Sitting in that cold room all those months ago, between bouts of therapies, if that was what it could be called, he had made a promise to make Kreeger pay. Not just for what he had done to David, or to him, but what he did to every person that walked in there.
Like lambs to the slaughter, the people that were supposed to love them the most led them here.

Noah had to believe that those people didn't realize what the cost was. That this place, this last resort to make their children “normal,” was prison to the kids sent here. He wanting to believe that those parents thought what they did was right.

They were wrong.

He turned over, eyes falling on the doorframe, trying to clear his mind of everything, trying to relax and sleep. He needed to be strong. It was too dark to see anything more than shadows and when one of the shadows in the hallway moved, Noah’s eye widened. Was that for him? His eyes flicked to the floorboard where he kept everything and his heart hammered so hard against his chest that he was scared someone could hear it.

“Noah?”

He would have yelped if he hadn't recognized the voice immediately. He crept from his bed to the doorway, finding Luke sitting on the floor outside Noah’s door, his back leaning against the wall. “What are you doing? Luke, you could get in trouble.” He wanted to keep the tremble out of his voice but that was impossible. Everything had changed and being afraid was smart.

Luke tsked, waving his hand in the direction of Noah’s voice. “Oh, please. They are all asleep. The next prison guard won't be around for a couple of hours.” His head angled back to look up at Noah, who was standing just inside the door and to Luke’s side. “Sit. You’re going to hurt my neck.”

Noah started to protest but Luke’s hand reached out and brushed across his calf, setting loose tremors that nearly made him fall, so he sat down instead. His back sliding down the wall, head turned to stare at Luke on the other side. “Why are you doing this?” He meant so much with that. Why was Luke making him want so much? Why was he forcing Noah to feel again? Why was he so beautiful that it hurt to look at him?

He would settle for knowing what Luke was trying to accomplish by talking to him now.

“Because I know what it’s like when you’re alone and scared. I don’t want you to go through that.”

Noah blinked back tears, forcing them down into that pit where he kept it all: despair, fear, anger, happiness and tightened its lid, staring back at Luke, one corner of his mouth turning upward even when he tried to stop it. “Thank you.”

Luke’s smile was large and bright in the darkness. Noah’s breath caught like it did every time. His stomach fluttered and before he could stop it, his hand inched forward on the floor, closer to Luke’s until they were brushing against one another. Luke glanced down, his hand moving until it was on Noah’s, and their fingers curled together. The shiver that ran over Luke was almost too much and his eyes closed.

“Do you think he remembers any of it?”

The question tumbled from his mouth out of its own volition. He hadn't wanted to know the answer, not really, not after having spent all day mourning the loss of a friend. He dared to look up at Noah, whose face showed the grief he had tried to hide. Luke’s hand tightened on Noah’s and when his question was finally answered, he knew he would have preferred not to know.

“He remembers everything.”

Somehow, that seemed worse for Ryan, for all of them. To remember but not care, to know that you were this way, but believe that it was wrong. There was so much good in Ryan. “Maybe it’s not hopeless. We could try to find a way to get through to him?”

Noah shook his head. “No.”

Luke started to argue but Noah turned and met his eyes.

“Luke, no. It won't work.”

The way Noah said his name, the look in his eyes; it was enough for Luke to believe him. “Okay. So, what are you going to do?”

Noah swallowed, his fingers tracing over Luke’s, and when Luke interlaced their fingers, he quietly said, “I don’t know.”

They sat like that for some time, their hands and fingers connected warm skin against warm skin. Luke’s thumb grazed across Noah’s unconsciously.

“I found him, you know.”

Luke froze, hearing the thickness in Noah’s voice, how it wobbled as he spoke. He knew that if he moved or said anything, Noah might stop. He just sat and waited.

“I didn’t… I didn’t know what to do. I lost time. I could have been…”

“It wasn’t your fault, Noah.”

Noah nodded his head. “It was, though. I knew how he felt. I told him we couldn’t be more than friends.” His eyes flicked all over the hallway, landing on one spot for the briefest of seconds before moving on to the next. Luke squeezed his hand, calming him, encouraging him to speak. Noah’s head fell forward, hiding his eyes from Luke and when he spoke, it was distant. “When I found him, he said that I had to save everyone. That I had to stop Kreeger from hurting someone else. That he had seen things but then he was gone. They found me with him. Took me away to…”

“To what?”

Noah tilted his head to one side and looked up at Luke. “To try to make me forget. It might have worked, too. If it hadn’t been for Rodney.”

Luke sat a little straighter. He’d known Rodney was different. “Rodney isn’t what we think, is he?”

Noah shook his head. “No. He’s not.”

*

It felt strange to be in her life now. As if she hadn't just woken up from a coma or a dream, but from a separate life. The new one she had was off kilter. Holden would hold her hand just a little tighter when the doctor would ask her questions. It was all still fuzzy. She couldn't remember what had happened and no one would tell her anything despite her growing frustration.

The doctors insisted it would be best if she remembered on her own.

The girls were as beautiful as ever and when she saw them again, she was relieved she hadn't lost too much time with them, hadn't missed anything that she couldn't get back. Holding Ethan for the first time, she had cried, her heart filled with so much love that it would burst.

Through it all, she asked for Luke. Wanted to see her son, hug him, and tell him she loved him. The first time she had asked, Holden had told her to rest. That there would be time for that.

The second time she had asked, it was her mother, and she had received some excuse that too many people couldn't see her at one time. Lily had stared at Lucinda as if she had suddenly grown another limb. This wasn't some random stranger or distant relative she wanted. It was her son. The fatigue had hit her hard right at that moment and she had to close her eyes, muttering Luke’s name.

The third time when she had asked, demanded, to speak to Luke, she had remembered everything. How she had treated him when he had told her that he was gay. The situation with Damian. How she had turned away from Holden. Almost forcing Luke to go with a complete stranger that would have hurt him. The fall down the stairs.

The clearest memory was the terror on Luke’s face as she fell.

So, when Holden walked into her room with flowers and the saddest of smiles, she had screamed for her son. When Holden didn't respond, she had believed she had damaged her son so much that he didn't want to see her. Holden took her hand, insisting that wasn't true but Lily knew.

“He hates me, doesn’t he?”

“Honey, no, that’s not -- Lily, he loves you.”

“Is he afraid of me? That I’ll hurt him again.” Lily shook her head. “I won't. I won't hurt him. I love him just as he is. He’s perfect to me.”

“I know that.”

Lily sat up in bed, leaning forward, hand clenched on her lap. “Then why won't he see me?”

Holden took a deep breath, and she knew, knew that whatever was going on had little to do with Luke hating her. “Holden, where is Luke?”

It was the desolate look in her husband’s eyes when he brought them to meet hers that made her heart tumble to the ground and nearly stop. “He’s missing, Lily. Our boy is gone and I don’t know where he is.” All the guilt he felt, all the pain he had hidden away let loose and tears rolled down Holden’s cheeks. “I let you down. I’m sorry.”

It took her some long minutes to comprehend.

Luke was gone.

Her son was missing.

Holden told her everything that had happened. How Damian had taken advantage of their son and used Luke’s guilt against him. At least, that was what Holden figured he did.

“Oh, God. Holden.” She wrapped one hand over her husband’s arm, pulling him closer. “What if he is hurt? I don’t understand. Why would he leave? He’s all alone out there.” Her questions muffled against his shoulder and his hand skimmed down her back, soothing her. Her eyes filled with tears and she shuddered in a breath. “We have to find him. We have to find him before it’s too late.”

Holden held her closer and silently prayed they were not already.

*

“This is ridiculous.” Henry hissed at her, hands on her waist, lips just under hers.

Jade rolled her eyes, leaning in more, brushing against him and trying to not laugh when Henry’s body responded despite his own horror. “Just chill out, Henry. We’re doing this to find Luke. So suck it up.”

Henry gritted his teeth, brushed hair that had fallen over her eyes back and glanced to the side. “Are you sure that he didn’t recognize you?”

“Me? No, I doubt it.”

“Okay. We just wait until he leaves and then we follow him. He’ll lead us to Luke.”

Jade snorted, shaking her head as she did. “I doubt that Luke is with him, Henry. Damian looks miserable.”

Henry nodded. “I have to say, I agree. Maybe we can figure out where Luke is from Damian. He has to know, or at least have some idea where we start.”

He glanced down at the young girl, her eyes betraying the bravado she showed the world. She was scared for her cousin and that made Henry’s heart melt a little. “We’ll find him.” He still wasn't sure how she had convinced him he would need her, but she had and now they were here. He turned his attention back to Damian who had been drinking steadily for a couple of hours now. That wasn't a good sign, but it was definitely a useful one as far as Henry was concerned. He could take on a drunken Damian, easily.

Jade pinched his arm and Henry focused his attention back on her. “What?”

“Don’t stare. It’s obvious. He’s noticing.”

“Sorry.” Henry looked back at her, forced to stare at her profile now that her neck craned to look around him.

“He’s leaving!”

Henry pulled back, watched Damian head to the back exit and he grabbed Jade’s hand in his. No one was following him, which meant he had left without a guard. This was their chance. “Come on. Let’s do this.”


*


It was hard for him not to touch Luke, now. He found that his hand would snake out to grab onto Luke‘s, or that he would raise it to brush his fingers across his face or arm. He caught himself every time, but the ache that was left behind was powerful. Evie had noticed and had started to step between them whenever she could. He knew she didn't disapprove but was only protecting them.

Luke didn't help any either. He would look up at him under his eyelashes, sending Noah’s heart to thump against his chest. He would send Noah a huge grin, making him weak in the knees. He hadn't actually understood or believed in that expression until he had met Luke.

Through all this, they were trying to plan. It was time. Noah had waited long enough, but he knew losing Ryan had been because of hesitating. The papers under his floor, the disks he’d managed to steal from Kreeger’s lab the last time, the notes that Rodney had given him, the journal that David had kept, that was enough. If he could get those to light, someone would come to look.

He wasn't sure exactly how he was going to get it all out.

“We can’t mail it.” Evie had stated the obvious, ripping her napkin into strips, a nervous tic she had picked up there. “They check our things before they send them out.”

Marc tapped one foot against the table in the empty room they had found on the first floor. It was lunch, and they had a few minutes before anyone would miss them.

“One of us has to take it.”

Three pairs of eyes looked up at Noah, startled.

He hadn't meant to say it but it was all he had been thinking about in the last few days, since everything had happened. One of them would have to leave, escape somehow, and take the information they had to the press or the police.

His eyes found Luke’s and before he knew what he was doing; he was standing in front of the other boy, hands on his shoulders. “I think it should be Luke.” His eyes never strayed for one moment, captured by the warmth he saw there. “He’s the bravest of all of us.”

Evie and Marc nodded in agreement. That much was true. Luke had guts to spare.

Luke’s hands reached to Noah, holding onto his arms. “You’re pretty damn brave, too, Noah. All of you are. It takes something to survive this place for so long and not have given in to them.”

“Just plain luck, dude.”

Luke shook his head. “No, there’s more than that.” One hand reached for Noah’s face, hesitating and when Noah didn’t move away, he brushed fingers on skin. Luke swallowed back the sudden needwanttaste. “I can’t leave you here.”

Evie and Marc exchanged glances, biting back grins at the scene. Something had definitely changed between Luke and Noah.

“We’ll be okay.” Noah spoke softly, and his face turned, warm breath on Luke’s palm. “Just think about getting home.”

Someone cleared their throat and when they all turned, Ryan and Paul were standing in the doorway. Each side stared at the other, unmoving until Marc’s voice filled the air.

“Well, fuck.”

It was all a blur after that. Kreeger storming into the room, glowering at Noah, something like satisfaction in his expression before pointing at Luke. Two goons had appeared from nowhere, grabbing Luke by the arms. Noah had stepped forward to stop them.

Marc and Evie made a move toward them but before he knew what had happened, they were both laying on the floor in a heap. When he looked up, Paul was holding a tazer in on hand, blanking staring at the floor. Noah leaped for him, but Luke’s voice yelling his name made him stop. He started for the door. He would rip them to shreds. He would make them take their hands off Luke.

Kreeger was standing in front of him, one hand holding a large clubbed stick. When Noah realized what was happening, he prepared to fight but then he felt a sharp pain, and it all went black.

*

There was a quiet knock on the door and Holden looked up to see Kevin Davis standing there, staring through the mesh of the screen. Next to him was a girl he knew vaguely.

“Kevin.”

He waved them in, forehead wrinkling with confusion. He couldn't begin to imagine what Kevin wanted. He hadn't seen his son’s best friend since before Luke had disappeared. Whatever it was Kevin was here for, Holden guessed it had to do with Luke.

“Mr. Snyder.” He turned to the girl next to him. “This is my friend, Becky. She’s the one that convinced me I had to come here.”

Becky nodded at him, speaking quietly. “Hello, Mr. Snyder. And that‘s not true. I was just the one with the car.” She had grown up with his son, had probably been in the same class with Luke since they were kids, like Kevin. She had seemed familiar. He had seen her in class pictures. She was skinny, with glasses and an intelligent face. The kind of girl Luke would have been friends, not Kevin.

It was the tremble of Kevin’s voice, the way the girl’s hand clutched at Kevin’s, which made Holden stop halfway across the room. When he looked at the boy, scared, he felt something shift inside. “It’s about Luke, isn’t it?”

Kevin nodded. “He called me.”

Holden held on to the island, fingers curling on the wood top, and he breathed through all the emotions. Luke was alive. He was alive and he talked to Kevin. “Oh, God.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t…”

Holden heard something else in the voice. Shame. “Kevin, what happened?”

Kevin started to speak so fast that Holden could barely make out what he was saying.

“He called me. On my cell. I was drunk. I’ve been drunk for a long time, ever since…it doesn’t matter. I was angry, too, because he had ruined everything. In my head, I mean. He was supposed to be my best friend. Not someone else that lied to me, that pretended.”

Holden fought away the urge to shake Kevin until he told him where Luke was. He knew the boy was going through some crisis of his own. “Kevin.”

Kevin continued as if Holden hadn't said anything. “So, when he called, I wasn’t me. I mean, I was but it was this angry, ugly me. And when he asked for help, I called him…I called him a name and told him not to call me.”

Holden fist hit the island hard and he growled out a curse. “You did what? How could...? Kevin, my son has been missing for months! Why would you turn him away?”

There was the smallest of sounds that came from Kevin and Holden reigned in his temper, remembering Luke mentioning Kevin’s not so stable home life. It was the boy’s pleading eyes that made some of the anger dissipate. “I’m so sorry, Mr. Snyder. I was drunk and I’d had all this time to let it fester, my anger, and I… know I did wrong. I want to help now.”

Holden spoke through clenched teeth. “Where is he?”

“He didn’t know. What he said didn’t make much sense either. Something about being somewhere near the Canadian border.”

“That was it?”

“Yes. That’s all he said before I hung up.”

Holden grabbed his cell phone, flipping it open and dialing Jack’s number. It was a lead. It was something they hadn't had before. He turned to look at Kevin, took in the way the Becky’s hand reached for his, the way Kevin clutched at it. There were some things you would never know about people.

“Thank you, Kevin.”

Kevin nodded, eyes meeting his. “It’s the least I could do.”

*

When Marc woke up, it was in his bed, darkness around him, and at first, he didn't remember. Then, it came rushing back suddenly, all the things that had happened, and he jerked up from his bed, fumbled for shoes in the dark. They had assumed he wouldn't do anything. They had assumed many things. He jumped out of his skin when a body blocked his door. A hand covered his mouth when he started to scream, and he craned up to look, stopping his struggling instantly. Rodney was looking back at him with a wounded expression.

As soon as he stopped moving, Rodney let him go and Marc gripped his arm. “They got Noah.” Rodney nodded and pointed down the hallway, indicating that was the direction they would be heading. Rodney grabbed a t-shirt and jeans from where they hung on Marc’s door and handed it to him. Marc didn't question it. He followed quietly, moving around the labyrinth that was this house at night, and hit Rodney’s back when he halted suddenly.

Marc looked around Rodney and saw Evie stepping out of her room. He ran to her and hugged his friend hard. “I thought they had hurt you.”

Evie held on to him, shaking her head. “No, but they got Luke and Noah. I don’t know where they took them.” She looked at Rodney and asked. “You know, don’t you?”

Rodney nodded. He barely ever spoke and when he did, it was usually to Noah. Evie didn't know why or how they knew each other. Rodney had shown up a few days after David had died and when Noah returned, it was Rodney he had talked to those first days. Then, he had been back at their table and she had barely seen them really talk. All she knew was that when she questioned him about Rodney, Noah had looked at her and told her to trust him.

She did. Now, they would have to trust Rodney.

“They’re going to hurt them, Rodney. We have to stop them.”

Rodney’s face turned to stone and when he spoke, it was deep and gravely, like he didn't use his voice often, which he didn't. “Like they did David.”

Evie froze, looking over at Marc who mirrored her own reaction. David. That was the link between them, David. “Oh, god. Like they did David.”

It was all he needed to hear. He grabbed each of them by the arm and started to drag them to the end of the hall and into the staircase there. Marc dug his heels in and stopped them. “Wait. Wait.” When he had their attention, he jerked his head behind him. “I think we need a distraction or something.” He backed away, waving them off. “You two go. Find them.”

Evie nodded. “You know where to meet us.”

Marc gave her a thumbs up, quietly moving down the hall and disappearing. Evie turned back around to Rodney. “Lead the way.”

*

Noah banged on the door, hands red and raw from use, his voice scratchy from yelling. It had been hours, daylight that slanted through the small window of the cell had turned to moonlight, and no one had come back for him.

“Let me go! Kreeger, let me out.”

The knock to his head had only afforded them a few minutes. When he came to, they were dragging him down the stairs. He could still hear Luke calling his name, as they were hauled into the cellar where Kreeger made sure to lock them up. His hands had reached for Luke, kicking out at the men holding him, fingers brushing skin, and then he was thrown into the room. At first, he just screamed for Kreeger, wanting to know what he was going to do to Luke. He was pretty sure he knew already. When his voice gave out, he sat on the floor, leaning his head on his knees and breathing deeply. His head throbbed, and he could feel something dripping down into his neck. Noah was sure it was blood but he couldn't worry about that. He had to get out.

Only he didn't have the first clue how to.

The daylight faded and when he was plunged into darkness, he found the strength and voice to fight. Crawling to the door, hands banging, he yelled and pounded until his arms hurt.

He had to get to Luke before they hurt him.

There was a sudden noise outside the door and Noah stopped, listening closely. “I swear, Kreeger. If you hurt him…” He couldn’t finish that statement because the door creaked open, slowly. Noah scooted back, the light shining in his eyes blinded him, and he wondered if he could crawl fast enough to get past the door.

“Noah.”

His vision cleared and Evie was standing over him, pushing back at the hair falling on his forehead. Reaching his hand out, he grabbed hers, pulling up onto his feet. Rodney stood just beyond the door and Noah waved at him to move. “We have to go.”

Evie reached for his head. “You’re bleeding, Noah.”

“Doesn’t matter. We have to go.”

They started down the hall, pausing at every corner to check for other staff. It was eerily quiet and deserted.

“I don’t like this.”

There was a sudden cacophony of noise, screams and then all hell seemed to break loose. An alarm blared out into the air, lights blinking rapidly, and one of the doors that lined the next hallway opened. A stream of people poured out all headed toward the same destination. Nobody noticed or cared they were there. He pushed Evie back against the wall and when the last person had vacated, the flashing lights their only guide, Noah rushed into the room. He knew exactly where he had to go.

Lying on the long metal table, arms and legs strapped to each end, pads on his temples, was Luke. Evie’s shocked scream was drowned out by the noise. She turned to look at Rodney, noticing that he had stayed behind at the door, their guard. Turning back around, she caught Noah’s hand skimming over Luke’s face. “Noah.”

He looked her way, nodding before turning back to Luke. “Help me untie him.”

Together they worked quickly to undo all the straps, Noah talking to Luke the entire time. “Luke, I need you to wake up for me. Please.” Noah pulled Luke up to a sitting position, finding Luke’s shirt and pulling it over him. One hand cupping the back of Luke’s head, the other gripping one arm. He leaned his head against Luke’s, whispering. “I need you, Luke. Please. I can’t do this alone.”

Luke’s head lolled to one side, no sign of consciousness , no twitch of anything, and Noah looked ready to cry. “Luke.” It strangled out from his mouth and Evie’s heart shattered just a bit. She felt someone pass her and before she knew it, Rodney was next to Noah.

“I can take him.”

Noah stared up at the other man, nodding after a moment, and backing away to let Rodney lift Luke into his arms. He wobbled as he moved back, gripping the table, waving Evie off when she started to rush to his side. “No. Go. Just go.” He could deal with the pain and fatigue later. He was tired. He was so tired. But they needed to run. They had the chance and Noah was willing to take whatever risk to get Luke out of there.

His gaze fell on the machine next to the table, the great long extension cord from the ceiling, the small needle attached to it. It looked like an evil version of the eye testing equipment that doctors used. Whatever Kreeger was hiding, however he was taking people’s lives from them, that had something to do with it.

Getting the hell out, getting to safety, getting Luke, getting all of them out was his priority.

He caught up with Evie and Rodney, holding onto Rodney’s shirt as they maneuvered through the flashing lights, avoiding the noise of crowds. There was a tunnel. Rodney had told him once. He realized as they plunged into complete darkness that they had reached it, and he walked blindly, hoping that what greeted them at the other end was freedom. It seemed to take forever; the only noise now was their harsh breathing.

He smelled the smoke as they kept walking and then it reached his eyes and mouth. Coughing caused his head to throb even harder, tears clouding his vision, pain coursing through him. It was worse then he guessed. His mind flashed to Luke, lying on that metal bed, and he forced it all away.

Then it was all fresh air and night sky and Rodney breaking into a run, heading towards the back woods. Noah didn't think and just followed on instinct. When they reached the edge, he caught movement from the corner of his eye, and when he looked closer, he saw Marc running toward them. The background was lit with red, gold, and gray clouds of smoke billowing out from the front of the mansion. Marc had been waiting for them.

Noah grabbed his friend, pulling him along with him. “What the hell did you do?”

“We needed a distraction!”

“You set the place on fire?!”

“Pretty much.”

Without another word, they broke through the trees, followed the noises of Evie and Rodney. Somewhere between that moment and the next, Noah halted. Everything ceased and Marc pushed him forward. “We got to go.”

Noah shook his head. “I can’t. Not without everything I left behind.”

Marc glared at him. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Evie appeared behind them, panting for air and staring at them as if they had lost their mind. She pointed in the direction they had been running, holding her hands out in question.

Rodney stepped out from the shadows, Luke still in his arms and looked at Noah, shaking his head fervently. “Noah, no. I’ll figure out another way. No.”

Noah responded with a nod of his own. “I have to, Rodney.” He threw an arm up in the air and screamed. “God damn it! All of it would have been in vain!”

“So would losing you.”

Luke’s voice carried weight in the space between them. Noah rushed forward, reaching out to touch Luke’s face. “You’re okay?”

“Define okay.”

Noah smiled at him, taking one hand, and caressing the knuckles. “You’re still a pain in the ass. That’s all that matters.”

“Noah Mayer, did you just use the word ass?” Luke’s voice trembled, but the sound made everything tilt back into place in Noah’s world.

“I guess I did.” He leaned in, hesitating and then brushed his lips over Luke’s forehead, hands holding his face. “Rodney knows what he’s doing, okay. Trust that.” He backed away and Luke’s hands reached for him.

“You can’t go back. You can’t.” There was fear and something more in Luke’s voice, and that was enough for Noah. It made his heart expand with the smallest bubble of happiness, even as inappropriate and stupid as it was at that moment, because Luke cared.

He patted at dirty blonde hair, touching skin with shaking fingers and when Luke glanced up at him, he leaned down to brush one kiss on trembling lips, burning and breathing, feeling their response for one second before he pulled away. “I have to. I can make it. Just keep going. I’ll be right behind you.”

“No.” Luke struggled against Rodney’s arms, falling back when pain creased across his head. “Noah, please.” He reached for him again, brushing hands on Noah’s arms, trembling waves of heat through him. “Please.”

“I promise. I’ll be behind you.”

He looked at Rodney, eyes saying what he wouldn't. They had a plan. If Noah didn't make it, he knew Rodney would go on.

He turned and ran back the way he came, ignoring the calls from his friends. Blocking out Luke’s voice screaming his name. When he glanced behind, Rodney was rushing them once more toward the road where he had stashed his van. That had been the original plan. Only now there were three instead of one. But he knew Rodney. He would get them where they needed to go.

Noah had to get the proof he had left behind.

That had been his responsibility.

If he didn’t, then all of it, David, Luke, everything would have been for nothing.


Part Six



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